Figures Don’t Lie, But Liars Figure

The expression “Figures don’t lie, but liars figure” is a pretty common one among statisticians. If you have pre-determined what you want the output to be, then you can often find a way to manipulate the figures to agree with that pre-determined result.

That is the case with a recent posting that I saw on Facebook that is trying to show that the issues behind Black Lives Matter is a made-up issue. Here is the chart that has been posted.

[Facebook chart]

The individual who made up this chart was at least honest in that he/she showed the source of the data and noted that it had been normalized to death rate per million people. But that’s where the honesty ended as the individual is clearly trying to make a point that “Blacks killed by Whites” is an insignificant figure.

I decided that I needed to look up the figures behind the chart to see what was going on. Here are the original figures from the FBI database. Note that these are from 2013 (apparently the most recent year for which the figures have been compiled and released) and they are part of an overall spreadsheet showing the number of murders committed in that  year by one person killing one person (i.e. eliminating any mass shootings, etc.). There are other columns and rows which have further breakouts by age, gender, etc. but the ones in the top left boxes are the ones that were used as the basis for the Facebook posting.

[FBI data]

I was able to find one analysis by someone else, but it is a lot of text and no graphics (*1). But here is my graphical analysis of what is going on here:

[Excel chart]

The individual “normalized” the raw numbers by converting them to murders per million people using the race of the perpetrator as the divisor (as shown in the yellow boxes). The figure of 245.4 million whites and 41.62 million blacks were used – I don’t know the source of these figures, but they seem relatively correct and I’ll not debate them here.

But it in the choice of using the race of the perpetrator that skews the results, since there are so many more whites than blacks that the former are divided by larger numbers and thus give small results. Let’s see what happens if you simply use the race of the victim instead (the ones in the outlined boxes).

While the right two results have not changed (i.e. white killing white and black killing black), the results in the two left columns are drastically different and show that whites killing blacks is now a larger figure that blacks killing whites, the exact opposite result as in the Facebook posting.

The full article in (*1) gives a more complete argument than I have made here. But it’s pretty obvious that this is yet another example of “Figures don’t lie, but liars figure.”

Notes:

*1 - https://www.reuters.com/article/uk-fact-check-bar-graph-black-white-homi/fact-check-misleading-bar-graph-presents-distorted-interpretation-of-black-and-white-murder-rates-idUSKBN23M2SX

Juneteenth

I am beginning writing this on June 19, 2020. That date would not have had much meaning to me until this year, but the national news has had a lot of focus on the fact that June 19^th is also known as “Juneteenth”. With this increased focus, I’d like to give a little historical perspective as well as investigate my own attitudes toward the principles being celebrated. Then I’ll take a brief look at how I have developed empathy before putting it all together.

[Emancipation Proclamation]

Historical Perspective

As noted in (*1), “Historically, Juneteenth has not been widely recognized outside of black communities, and it’s taken some time for the general public to acknowledge the date officially.” According to (*2), it was not an official holiday outside of a few states (TX, OK, FL, MN) until the last 20 years. Indeed, there was no proclamation of it in my state of PA until 2019 (*3).

When I was growing up in CT, the history of the US was not only part of the subject matter in elementary school, but was the focus of an entire year of social studies at the high school level. In our discussions of the US Civil War, there was a recognition that “Abraham Lincoln freed the slaves.” But that simple statement masks a somewhat complicated timeline.

The US Constitution of 1787, while not using the term “slave” or “slavery”, did in fact make allowance for them in Article I, Section 2, where it allocated representatives based on “the whole Number of free Persons” and “three fifths of all other Persons,” thus noting that slaves were not worth as much as others. Thus, Lincoln was bound by the Constitution in what he was allowed to do as President. But there were other ways of making it happen.

First, the District of Columbia was not part of any state, but was under the direct control of the federal government. Thus, on April 16, 1862, Lincoln signed the “District of Columbia Compensated Emancipation Act” which ended slavery in DC (*4). This established the first “Emancipation Day” as April 16.

Second, during the Civil War, Lincoln, using his war powers as Commander in Chief of the Armed Forces, announced on September 22, 1862, and then signed on January 1, 1863, the Emancipation Proclamation (*5), which freed any slaves in an area which was taken under the control of the US military. This proclamation thus circumvented the wording in the Constitution. It also meant that the date that slaves became emancipated was dependent on when that part of the southern US became under control of the Union Army. It also was the official acknowledgement that the Civil War was not just about the states which had seceded from the US, but that the war was a bid to end slavery. Psychologically, it was the turning point of the war.

But by using this definition, the exact date of “emancipation” in each part of the country varied based on when the US military took control. As noted in (*6), Florida celebrated it as May 20 based on the first reading of the Emancipation Proclamation there in May 1865; Mississippi celebrated it on May 8 (“Eight o’ May”); Eastern Kentucky celebrated it on August 8, and Texas celebrated it on June 19.

Moreover, since the Emancipation Proclamation only applied to those southern states that were taken control of by the Union Army, any slaves in the northern states were not freed by it. Most states in the north had already done so by this time, but because of the above inclusion of the three-fifths rule in the Constitution, it took a Constitutional Amendment, the 13^th, to officially end slavery in the rest of the US. The amendment was proposed in January 1865, and was officially ratified by the necessary number of states on December 6, 1865.

So, when was “Emancipation Day?” It depended on where you lived. I grew up in CT where slaves were gradually emancipated, beginning with the blocking of importation of slaves in 1774, then the passage of the “Gradual Abolition Act” in 1784, proposed legislation in 1844, and finally the passage of “An Act to Prevent Slavery” in 1848 (*7). But this date was never celebrated, so if you asked me “when is Emancipation Day?” I would have answered with the April 16 date. Even though that technically only applied to the Federal Government, since that meant that some government offices were closed on that day, that would have had an impact on me.

Thus, until recently, Emancipation Day was a local celebration which happened on different dates in different parts of the country, and which had a level of significance which also varied – although it certainly had more significance among the African-American community. And it’s only been in the last two decades that the movement to focus on a common date has gained momentum with “Juneteenth” being “chosen” as that common date.

My Own Attitudes

Growing up in a small town in Connecticut, I had very little exposure to individuals who were other than of European extraction. As I noted in my autobiography:

The year [early 1960s] we traveled to Clarksville, GA, was my first exposure to the southern part of the US.  My sister and I were walking down the main street of the town with the daughter of the plant manager and I saw something on the other side of the street.  I wanted to cross over, but she stopped me because that was the “colored” part of town.  I was unused to this kind of treatment of race and it bothered me.  There were only a few colored folks in Wolcott.  One was a good friend in Boy Scouts, Shawn Moore.  He lived all the way on the other end of town and was awarded a scholarship to a private boarding school for high school, so I no longer saw him after that.  The other was a girl from Waterbury whose parents paid the tuition to send her to Wolcott schools which had a better reputation.  Her name was Sandra Raleigh, and since homeroom seating was alphabetical, I sat near her for our high school years.  As a result, color of skin was never significant to me. (*8)

My next exposure was the summer after high school, when I got a job recapping tires to help pay my college expenses. The co-workers at the small company where I worked were a very diverse bunch – the manager was of Swedish background, the foreman was Italian, and the other two workers were a French-Canadian, and a black fellow (*9). I got along with all of them, but it was certainly a mix that was very different from my high school class.

There were a few more non-Europeans in college, but none in the living unit where I spent those years, so I still had little interaction with them. Even when I married and started working, I was still pretty isolated. The small township where I now live only had .16% African-American in a recent federal census (*10).

Developing Empathy

Surrounded mostly by those “like me,” how could I develop empathy, the ability to identify with others who are not like me? That answer has three parts.

First, for the last decade of my working at Air Products, I was the IT Account Manager for our international subsidiaries and joint ventures. This put me in contact with various parts of the organization around the world, including Asia, the Middle East, parts of Northern and Eastern Europe, and Latin America. Since I most often traveled on my own, I took advantage of the opportunity to really get to know those from other cultures so that I could properly represent them to Global IT as needed. So being able to see things through the eyes of others was a skill that I needed to develop. I could give many examples of this, but that would not contribute to the subject under discussion, so I’ll refrain from doing so. But interestingly, when I retired, it was not my international relationships that I saw as my greatest contribution to the company. Rather, it was that by using those same skills, I was able to build an employee diversity group devoted to the needs of those with disabilities (*11).

Secondly, for about 20 years I worked as a volunteer for an international exchange student organization (AFS). This put me in direct contact with high-school students – both US students going abroad who needed training in cultural adaptation, and foreign students in the US. My wife and I also hosted a few students from other cultures. There is nothing so helpful in learning about other cultures than having daily contact. I was also fortunate enough to travel to several other countries (Hong Kong, Thailand, Costa Rica, Ghana) and spend time with a few of these students in their home cultures – in several cases living in their homes for a short period just as they had lived in mine (*12).

Finally, for the past several years I have gotten quite involved in genealogy research. While looking at just my ancestors only confirms the homogeneous nature of my heritage, as I look at my various cousins, second cousins, third cousins, etc. and see how my extended family has spread, I have come to appreciate the fact that there is a lot of diversity in that extended family. Diversity issues include things like race, gender orientation, politics, life style, etc. (*13)

As a result of all of these factors, I have been able to develop a strong sense of empathy, even though it has not been empathy for African-Americans. So, this year I am making an effort to focus some of it in that direction.

Putting It All Together

I noted in a posting about Black Lives Matter earlier this month (*14) that “putting yourself in someone else’s shoes and seeing things from their perspective is HARD,” and that “I have a lot more thinking to do on this subject.” For the past two weeks I have been doing exactly that.

I’ve seen a number of postings on social media that say that since there are no persons now living who were slaves, nor are there any still living who were slave owners, that we should just be able to drop the whole issue and move on. But it’s not that simple.

Earlier this week I read an article entitled “3 Things Schools Should Teach About America’s History of White Supremacy” (*15). The three points of this article are (1) that the aftermath of the Civil War did not really end until the 1940s, (2) the Jim Crow era (which lasted until the 1950s) was violent, and (3) that racial inequality was preserved through housing discrimination and segregation (which did not end until the 1960s). So, while “slavery” in the pre-Civil War sense ended in the 1860s, there were other kinds of racially-motivated oppression that carried on for another century. And even though “redlining” which kept African-Americans in segregated urban settings ended several decades ago, there were other things that continued to reinforce that segregation that are still continuing until today – including such things as (1) welfare policies that reward poor urban families if the father is not in the home and thus continuing things into further generations, and (2) the “like me” syndrome that we all have that makes us mentally want to be with others like ourselves and thus encourages the urban “clumping” to continue (*16).

I’ve seen other postings complaining, “Why do we need yet another holiday? Isn’t having Martin Luther King, Jr. Day enough?” But that’s like asking, “Why do we need to have the Fourth of July, Memorial Day, and Veteran’s Day? Isn’t one holiday about war enough?” So yes, I do believe that we need to have another holiday. And just like you can celebrate the Fourth of July even if your ancestors did not come to this country until 200 years later, so you can celebrate Juneteenth if you are not black. As an article in The Atlantic put it, “And so, in the middle of a chaotic period in this nation’s history, Black Americans pause to celebrate. They will barbecue, and dance, and pray, and love, and live in the name of freedom. The rest of American can use the day off to work on its own freedom – from a shameful past and a violent present.” (*17).

So, while the date of June 19^th is historically only significant in Texas, it’s good that we can align around a common date to recognize the legal end of slavery in the United States of America. After all, we aligned around the Fourth of July in a similar fashion (*18).

I’d like to close with a quote from Alveda King, a niece of Martin Luther King, Jr. “Yes, segregation is over. Yes, Jim Crow is over. Yes, slavery is over. This year it’s time for us to learn to live together as brothers and sisters.” (*19)

Notes:

*1 - https://www.theatlantic.com/culture/archive/2020/06/juneteenth-has-always-been-worthy-celebration/613270/?utm_source=pocket&utm_medium=email&utm_campaign=pockethits

*2 - https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Juneteenth

*3 - https://pittsburgh.cbslocal.com/2019/06/19/juneteenth-declared-state-holiday-in-pennsylvania/

*4 - https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/District_of_Columbia_Compensated_Emancipation_Act

*5 - https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Emancipation_Proclamation

*6 - https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Emancipation_Day#United_States

*7 - https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/History_of_slavery_in_Connecticut.

*8 - https://www.amazon.com/My-Life-Story-Russell-2014-11-17/dp/B01F7Y590E/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=%22my+life%22+alan+russell&qid=1592628373&sr=8-1

*9 - https://ramblinrussells.blogspot.com/2019/06/dirty-jobs.html

*10 - https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Upper_Milford_Township,_Lehigh_County,_Pennsylvania

*11 - https://ramblinrussells.blogspot.com/2017/09/a-legacy-of-diversity.html

*12 - https://ramblinrussells.blogspot.com/2018/09/being-special.html

*13 - https://ramblinrussells.blogspot.com/2018/08/diversity-in-my-family-and-friends.html

*14 - https://ramblinrussells.blogspot.com/2020/06/black-lives-matter.html

*15 - https://getpocket.com/explore/item/3-things-schools-should-teach-about-america-s-history-of-white-supremacy

*16 - https://ramblinrussells.blogspot.com/2015/03/the-like-me-syndrome.html

*17 - https://www.theatlantic.com/culture/archive/2020/06/juneteenth-has-always-been-worthy-celebration/613270/?utm_source=pocket&utm_medium=email&utm_campaign=pockethits

*18 - https://ramblinrussells.blogspot.com/2019/08/war-is-long-process.html

*19 - https://www.foxnews.com/us/juneteenth-calls-increase-national-holiday

Medical Cost of Aging

For the first half-century+ of my life I was pretty healthy. Apart from an occasional Tylenol for a headache or a Band-aid for a minor cut, I had no underlying health conditions (at least that I knew of). But over the last 20 years that has changed significantly. I now have a number of different conditions, all of which have ongoing costs associated with them. Here are my conditions and the associated costs. (Note that I have given each one a letter that I will reference in the writeup below.)

(A) Kidney Stone – In 2001, I had a kidney stone that turned out to be a uric acid stone. I’ve written about that here (*1). Since excess uric acid is also the cause of gout when it builds up in your joints (usually the knees and ankles), that is not something that I want to have to deal with – never mind having another extremely painful kidney stone. After 10 years I no longer need to have any medical review, but still need ongoing medication.

(B) Heart Attack – In January 2005, I had a massive heart attack that could have easily resulted in my death. Survival rate is only 5-10%, so I’m one of the lucky ones. (*2, *3) I have had no long-term effects, but there are number of medications that I take to prevent another one. I meet annually with my cardiologist. There are also some interesting issues related to this that I will discuss in more detail below.

(C) Diabetes – for several years I was pre-diabetic, but as time has passed, my blood sugars have slowly crept upwards so that now I am in the diabetic range. Diabetes has a number of side effects, including eye problems (I get mine checked every year and I have no difficulties there), neuropathy (nerve damage in the extremities) (I have no feeling in the front half of both feet), and others. This and the following issue are the primary discussion items when I meet with my primary care physician every three months.

(D) High Triglycerides – Most of my blood test results (other than glucose) are right where they should be. My cholesterol in particular is quite good. But the exception is that my triglycerides are off the chart. Without treatment they have been over 900 (the normal range is <200).

(E)  Arthritic buildup in the joint behind my right toe – this causes a bulge in the joint and puts all the weight on it when walking. When the callus that had built up broke loose, I eventually had nearly two years of treatment and had two bouts of sepsis (blood poisoning) that put me in the hospital for a week each time (*4). So, to prevent any further issues. I meet with my podiatrist every two months for a checkup to prevent ongoing complications.

Besides the cost of visits with various physicians, there are a number of ongoing costs for various medications and other medical implements.

[Pills]

Pictured here are my daily pills. The top row I take each morning, the bottom row I take in the evening. From left to right (the order I take them), their names and costs are:

(1)   Farxiga – diabetes treatment (C) – $360 (90 days)

(2)   Ezetimibe – cholesterol lowering (D) (even though mine is ok, this will help keep in under control while we work on my triglycerides – $76 (90 days)

(3)   Niacinamide – vitamin supplement, non-prescription – $5 (90 days)

(4)   Metformin – diabetes treatment (C) – $3 (90 days)

(5)   Metoprolol Tartrate – to keep blood pressure from getting elevated which could cause heart damage (B) – $3 (90 days)

(6)   Allopurinol – keep urine from getting too acidic (A) – $8 (90 days)

(7)   Lisinopril – ACE inhibitor to prevent further heart attacks (B) – $2.50 (90 days)

(8)   Low dose Aspirin – general heart (B) – $10 (90 days)

The first and last in the bottom row are repeats of (4) and (5) as I take them twice daily. The other one is:

(9)   Simvastatin – cholesterol lowering (D) (even though mine is ok, this will help keep in under control while we work on my triglycerides – $5 (90 days)

In total, that’s about $2000/year for medications, with Farxiga accounting for ¾ of the total.

[Fish oil]

In addition to the medications taken in pill form, one of the best things that helps lower my triglycerides (D) is fish oil. Because my triglyceride level is so high, taking fish oil in the usual capsule form would be a handful each day and pretty unmanageable. So, I have found a source of pure liquid fish oil that is much easier to manage. I take 4 teaspoons a day, so a bottle like the one shown here lasts about a month. Cost – $42 (30 days) or $500/year.

[Glucose Monitor]

In order to monitor my blood sugars (C), I do a daily finger stick. This is especially important anytime there is a change in my medications to make sure that I’m heading in the right direction. It can also give me any feedback on how I’m doing and whether I need to pay more attention to my diet. The only ongoing cost is for the lancets and test strips, but both of those are totally covered by Medicare so there is no cost to me.

[Trulicity]

 Even with the above medications, my blood sugar levels (C) were slowly creeping higher. So, a month ago my primary care physician prescribed a weekly injectable medication. These types of medications are Tier 3, so the cost is not covered to the extent that most of the others are. With a list price of nearly $800/month for 4 once-a-week injectors, the cost to me is $214/four weeks or $2800/year. Not cheap, but I’ve seen my blood glucose levels drop nearly 40 points so far!

[Shoes]

In order to prevent future incidents of a callus buildup on my right foot (E), I need to wear shoes that have a thicker cushion on the bottom and prevent the pressure that causes the callus in the first place. These are the ONLY shoes that I wear, so I need a new pair every year or so.

While I could have Medicare cover the cost of these shoes because of my neuropathy, that’s not the reason I really need them, so I choose to cover the cost myself. $145/year

[CPAP]

I’ve saved the most interesting picture for last. During my last visit with my cardiologist (done via telemedicine), he noted that he has become convinced that there is a definite connection between sleep problems and heart complications. At his advice, I completed a 3-day sleep study – all done at home by following the directions. This included a finger cuff for measuring blood oxygen levels, a chest strap to measure breathing, and a strap around my head with inputs near my nose to measure breathing, sound levels, and any stoppages. After mailing it back and getting it analyzed, the cardiologist noted that my snoring was slight (and confirmed by my wife as it used to be much worse), but that I had breathing stoppages quite often. Thus, he recommended using a CPAP. I’ve only had this a short time.

In the picture here, I have first a chin strap to keep my mouth closed (I am normally a mouth breather so this forces me to breath through my nose), as well as the CPAP that keeps positive air pressure and stops my air passages from closing down and eliminating the breathing stoppages. I’ve only just begun using it and am building up the amount of time that I wear it each evening. While having the connection on the top of my head allows me to turn from one side to the other, it still requires me to take it all off if I need to go to the bathroom – which, like many people my age, I often need to do in the middle of the night. But the hardest adjustment is learning to breath only through my nose – however I know that this is best, as mouth-breathing is also a contributing factor to my poor oral/gum health.

Cost – unknown at this time as I have just gotten started and am using the supplies that came with it. But I know that it will eventually include small air filters, distilled water, and perhaps other items.

Summary

The above add up to about $5500/year, most of which is just the Farxiga and Trulicity which total $4300/year. As some have noted, getting older is not for sissies. I’m glad that I’m in a spot financially that these costs are manageable.

Notes:

*1 - https://ramblinrussells.blogspot.com/2017/03/surviving-kidney-stone.html

*2 - https://ramblinrussells.blogspot.com/2015/09/my-heart-attack.html

*3 - https://ramblinrussells.blogspot.com/2017/02/surviving-heart-attack.html

*4 - https://ramblinrussells.blogspot.com/2017/05/scenes-from-my-hospital-bed.html

Black Lives Matter

Two things happened this weekend that when put together have caused me to rethink some of how I feel and should react to some of the current protests going on in this country.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - -

The first was that my sister Dawn posted a lengthy entry on her blog called Uncomfortable Truths (*1). In it she talks about how she had been responding to the current protests over the death of George Floyd, how some of her African American friends called her out over her initial response, her upbringing and how that shaped her perspective, and how all that is causing her to rethink what her attitudes and response should be to the current situation.

In response to that posting, my niece Amy gave a very thoughtful posting of her own. Since it is not in a blog that I can point you to, I’ve reproduced it below (*5) if you want to read it. There are also a lot of YouTube/podcast references that you can listen to for additional input.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - -

The second thing was a discussion that my wife and I had with a church friend who is a retired missionary who spent much of her life in Thailand and China. As we talked, I realized that there is much in common between some of what we were talking about and the above topic.

The commonality is in the way that we Americans view other cultures when we get involved in them. We tend to want to approach missions as introducing others not only to our God, but to do so by expecting them to adopt “American ways” of relating to that God. Instead, we need to recognize that there are other ways that are not the same as we are used to and that we need to be “culturally appropriate” and “culturally sensitive” as we work together. It’s not that “our” way is “right” and theirs is “wrong,” but that there are multiple ways that may both be “right.”

- - - - - - - - - - - - - -

I haven’t yet thought through in enough detail to know exactly how to react to all the nuances of the current Black Lives Matter outrage, but I have had more exposure to non-US culture than most and I’ve tried (although not always successfully) to be culturally appropriate in all my foreign travels and experiences. I’ve written a few articles on this before (*2, *3), so you can read those in their entirety if you desire.

But the point is not the individual situation/circumstances, but the attitude that one needs to have – the ability to see things from someone else’s viewpoint.

Thus, if someone says, “Black Lives Matter,” giving a response of “All Lives Matter” is NOT the right way to respond. Yes, it’s true that all lives matter, but to give such an insensitive response is to show that you don’t give credibility to the other person’s point of view – one where they feel that they are marginalized.

Similarly, telling someone that they have the same educational opportunities or they can just move out of the urban areas and into the suburbs where you live is to be insensitive to several aspects. For one, it’s hard to feel comfortable being with others who are different than you (I’ve written about this before in (*4)). And it’s also hard to focus on schooling and studying when all around you are many who have given up and who depend on the street gangs to be a substitute for the nuclear family that those of us already in the suburbs take for granted.

Make no mistake – putting yourself in someone else’s shoes and seeing things from their perspective is HARD. I’ve learned how to do so in other cultures around the world and I’m sure I’ve made many mistakes along the way (and been graciously forgiven for them because they knew I was trying). I have not had the opportunity to do so among other cultures (like inner-city black cultures in the US). And I would most certainly make many more mistakes there as well. But to just ignore the current cultural “wars” taking place in this country is not the right approach.

I have a lot more thinking to do on this subject (and actions to take as a result). But I’d like to end with one more story as an illustration.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - -

On my first trip to China there were three of us who thought we’d take a break from eating Chinese food and we had seen a McDonalds just a block or so away from the hotel as we had been riding our bus back that afternoon. So, we took a walk to find it. This was a local McDonalds, not like the big touristy ones on Tiananmen Square. No one there spoke English, there were no snaky lines going up to the counter – it was just chest-to-back, shoulder-to-shoulder crammed together. If someone hesitated in moving up, then someone else would cut in line. Once you got your food you just lifted the tray over your head, turned sideways to make your way out from the counter, etc.  I looked it over, decided that I needed to do as the locals did, made my way to the front of the line, ordered (having looked over the menu board which had pictures on it, just held up one finger, pointed to the value meal #1 and said “coke” which is universal), got my food, paid in yuan, and exited from the counter area. My two colleagues, observing typical US customs, left space between themselves and the person in front of them and got cut off several times before they got to the counter.

Back in the dining area, I again looked around and saw no empty seats. But I could see that the way you got a seat was to find a person who was finishing up, stand right next to/behind them to “claim” that seat until they finished their last fry, then sit down when they got up. Sharing a table with someone else was “normal”. So, I did the same, claimed a soon-to-be-vacated seat, then sat down with a nice Chinese family and ate my meal. My two compatriots couldn’t figure it all out and ended up carrying their trays outside where they sat on the curb eating.

As we all finished and were walking back to the hotel, I said, “that was fun!” as I had enjoyed the cross-cultural experience. The other two said, “that was horrible!” as they had felt jostled, cut off, had trouble ordering as they had to wait for someone to help them order in English, hadn’t been able to find a comfortable seat, etc. My being able to see a different way of doing things and putting aside my prejudices in how things “ought” to be, gave me a richer experience.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - -

The same is true in the current Black Lives Matter environment. We need to recognize that other people’s perspectives are valid and empathize with them, not respond with platitudes such as “All Lives Matter.”

As I said earlier, I don’t have all the answers, nor have I had the experiences to give me the level of understanding that I would like. And I’ll probably make many more mistakes as I figure out the best way to react/respond to all that is going on. But I hope that others will forgive me when I make those mistakes, because I really do want to try. The love and compassion for others that is required by my God and my Christian faith demands that of me.

Notes:

*1 - https://life-goes-on-2020.blogspot.com/2020/06/uncomfortable-truths.html?m=1&fbclid=IwAR1yYAChgw-6h7fgVGqYObn_M4pSNGqDeKFQd8gAXRIHqdhoIN2EVd-4A98

*2 - https://ramblinrussells.blogspot.com/2015/07/cultural-adaptation.html

*3 - https://ramblinrussells.blogspot.com/2019/04/crossing-cultural-divide.html

*4 - https://ramblinrussells.blogspot.com/2015/03/the-like-me-syndrome.html

*5 - Amy’s Response:

Hi Aunt Dawn,

One of the things I have been most amazed by recently is the humility and vulnerability people have shown when they learn that maybe there have been things happening that they haven’t seen or realized before. I am myself humbled and impressed to hear you tell the story of taking a step back to try to understand more about what your friends meant when they responded to your post. In that way, you set an example for all of us in doing this. I hope we all have the courage to do the same.

I myself have learned some things along the way, and I wanted to share some resources that have been helpful to me, and may help us understand what’s happening even more.

“The 13th” is a movie about the 13th amendment that really gives a great historical perspective on how we got here today. I saw recently that it’s free to watch on YouTube. https://youtu.be/krfcq5pF8u8

Like you, I, for a long time in my life thought that ‘not seeing race’ was the best thing I could do - that it was the best way to see people equally. However, what I’ve learned along the way is that the ‘colorblind’ perspective can actually hurt our understanding of the world and others. So, you ask, “does that make you a bad person?” No- to the contrary actually. This article sums up nicely this lesson that others have taught me along the way: https://www.washingtonpost.com/nation/2018/10/05/white-parents-teach-their-children-be-colorblind-heres-why-thats-bad-everyone/

Additionally, once we allow ourselves to see race, we also can start to allow ourselves to see our own implicit biases. I used to think that if I were to admit I am biased, I would be a bad person, however, what I’ve learned, like everything else, that once you can see it and admit it, you can work on it. Plus, bias is often a result of unconscious thought, not conscious. I find it comforting to understand that it’s not because I am a bad person I have biases, but it’s because these narratives are interwoven so deeply into our society, that it would have been impossible for me not to pick up on those messages over time. I would recommend this podcast in thinking about unpacking the issue of bias: https://www.npr.org/programs/invisibilia/532950995/the-culture-inside

I also really like this podcast by Ibram Kendi and Brene Brown, where they talk about racism as so ubiquitous it’s like the rain. https://brenebrown.com/podcast/brene-with-ibram-x-kendi-on-how-to-be-an-antiracist/

And... that’s a lot of podcasts! I’d love to learn more from the resources you’re reading and listening to as well. Thank you again for sharing what was on your heart and mind.

New and Old Cousins

Over the past few months, I have contacted or made connections to a number of different cousins – and all through different paths. This is the story of those connections.

The Mill Plain Connection

Because of some of my blog postings are about my Pierpont relatives in Waterbury, and some mentions of their connections to the Mill Plain church, I had received a friend request around the beginning of the year from a man who had interests in that area. He was not a relative, so I vetted him before accepting his friend request, but eventually agreed to it. He was heavily involved in the Boy Scouts, in particular a troop that met at that church.

A few weeks later he posted a picture of a partial page from the Waterbury paper with some pictures on scouts receiving their Eagle awards. In one of the pictures was an older scout master with the name listed as “Bill (‘Bones’) Meo.” The name and age were about right and I wondered if this individual could be my 2^nd cousin, grandson of my great-aunt Loretta. I figured that there couldn’t be too many people with that name living in Waterbury. After a small amount of investigation, I determined that he was in fact my cousin, one whom I had not had contact with in about 60 years. (Bill’s older sister, Cynthia, was 4 years younger than myself and was the one I actually remembered as Bill was 9 years younger than I).

I had information about the Meo family in my family tree as I had been in contact with Bill’s parents, Bill and Shirley via phone over the years, the most recent being a phone call when Shirley had passed away in January 2017. I figured that this was a sign and within a few days added Bill, Cynthia, and Cynthia’s daughter Carah to my FB friend list. I’ve had a few online discussions with them in the months since then and it felt good to renew those long-ago friendships.

[Picture of Bill Meo]

The Friend Connection

Spurred on by the renewed friendship, I posted to my blog in March about all my 2^nd cousins and how many I was still in touch with (*1). In the section about my cousins through my Pierpont great-grandparents, I noted that I had “11 second cousins, not in contact with any of them.” But I did note that there was one whose name I was familiar with while growing up (Francesca Merrill Friend) whose name I knew because my mother had made mention of her often as my mother was apparently in communication with her first cousin (Merrill Friend) at that time. Francesca was a year older than myself, which may have accounted for my mother knowing of her at the time she was expecting my birth.

I wondered what had ever happened to Francesca and whether I could find her using my well-developed genealogical investigation skills. With a somewhat unusual name, I figured I had a least a good chance of doing so. With information about her from the Pierpont family genealogies, I knew her married name as well as the name of her husband and daughter – key things to go on when tracing female relatives.

It only took a few days, but I was able to find both Francesca and her daughter living in Oakland, CA. I contacted her and got an initial response that included, “How did you figure out who I am? I don’t think I know ONE relative of my father’s.” We have now become friends on Facebook, and now she can say that she knows one relative on her father’s side. I am happy to finally make her acquaintance after 70 years of knowing about her, but never actually meeting her.

A Chance Encounter

In early March I received an email from my niece Kathy VanDeCar. She had been getting her car worked on and the person doing the work noticed her last name and asked whether she was related to a relative of hers, Barbara VanDeCar. Knowing I was the family genealogist, Kathy asked, “Do you happen to know if I am related to a Barbara VanDeCar who is a cousin of the Pingel family name?”

The VanDeCar is a fairly uncommon one and since it originated in the Hudson River Valley in the early 1600s, I know that all individuals with that name are related to each other (*2). But could I find the connection? Within a few days I had located Barbara and her relatives, including one who lived in Petoskey, MI (the same town as Kathy was from and just mile or so from her brother, Marty). I was also able to document that leg of the family tree by tracing it back to its NY roots.

I contacted a few of the family members, discovering that like Francesca above, they knew little of their family heritage. I was able to enlighten them and be able to say, “hello cousin” to yet a few more members of my wife’s extended family.

An African Connection

One of my long-time friends is a retired missionary, Dick Gehman. He spent his time as a missionary in Kenya working with the African Inland Mission (AIM). Recently he’s bee posting to Facebook about his missionary service and last week he posted a picture of Charles Hurlburt, the director of AIM from 1901-1928. There was something about that name that triggered some thoughts in my mind and I decided to see where there might be some connections.

Hurlburt is one of those names that has undergone variations in spelling over the generations, so you will find some individuals who spell it Hurlburt, some Hurlbert, some Hurlbut, and even some Hulburt. I found mention of Charles in Wikipedia and was able to get his birth and death dates (1860-1936) and the name of his father. Using that I was able to trace his genealogy and found that while Charles was born in Iowa, his family had come there from NY and before that had been in VT and CT. In CT the family had been in Woodbury, a place that I was familiar with and before then had immigrated from England. I had a few individuals in my extended family tree with that name, but they were my wife’s ancestors. The Hurlburt members who came from England were connected to her, making Charles my wife’s 6^th cousin, several times removed.

But there was another reason that I remembered the Hurlburt/Hurlbut family name. While the ancestral family trees indicated that the family was from Woodbury, CT, they were more correctly from what is today Roxbury, CT. Woodbury was initially settled in the mid-late 1600s. Roxbury was split off from Woodbury in 1796. According to Roxbury history (*3), the Hurlbut family settled in what is now Roxbury in the early 1700s, so they were there for nearly a century before Roxbury was founded.

My great-aunt and uncle, Aunt Irene and Uncle Joe Hartwell, lived in Roxbury. Uncle Joe had moved there with his family some time prior to 1917 and he lived in the same house until after Aunt Irene’s passing in 1981. When my father was growing up, he spent many of his summers staying with them in Roxbury (*4).

I have a picture that was taken at the Hartwell 25^th anniversary in July 1948. Joe and Irene are (#24 and #20). Nearly everyone else in this picture is a relative of theirs. But on the left side of the picture (#2) is Alden Hurlbut. Alden is a sixth cousin of Charles Hurlburt who lived in Kenya. Alden’s obituary, written in 1998 by his son, notes that Alden was a seventh-generation Roxbury native and farmer.” He was a close neighbor and good friend of the Hartwells and so had been invited to this milestone celebration in their lives. My father is on the right-hand side (*29) and he and Alden would have certainly known each other from my father’s summers in Roxbury.

But as I finish the four different cousin connections in this blog, I note that it has come full circle. Also in this picture at #6 and #9 are Bill Meo and Shirley MacNaught who I mentioned above. They are not yet married, only dating at this time, but would marry a few years later and go on to have Cynthia and Bill (Jr.) in the coming decade.

Cousin Connections! They are everywhere.

[Hartwell Anniversary]

Notes:

*1 - https://ramblinrussells.blogspot.com/2020/03/second-cousins.html

*2 - https://ramblinrussells.blogspot.com/2017/03/genealogy-story-vandecar-family.html

*3 - http://www.nynjctbotany.org/lgtofc/roxburyhist.html

*4 - https://ramblinrussells.blogspot.com/2015/02/genealogy-story-nomadic-life-of-vernon.html

Surviving Home Schooling

Back in early March when the first cases of the COVID-19 virus were beginning to be counted in the US, the schools in PA closed for a few weeks. The governor announced that the schools would be shut down from 3/16 to 3/29. We didn’t give a lot of thought to it at the time. Kim’s workplace also closed down and she was working from home on her laptop. When it seemed that the schools might be closed for a while, they made up packets of materials for each student and I dropped by to pick up copies for each of the boys since printing four packets would have been a strain on my home printer.

The packets were optional at that point and designed to keep the students busy and involved so they would not get “rusty” from the lack of schooling. Donna was the primary educator and devoted her day to working with each boy and keeping them busy with other activities when she wasn’t working with them.

About a week later, on 3/23, the governor announced that schools would remain closed through 4/7. Because we already had a spring break scheduled in April, the boys’ school was planning on reopening on 4/15. But just a week later, a further announcement was made that all public schools in the state would remain closed for the rest of the school year.

Meanwhile, the teachers at school had all had a crash course in online delivery of learning, the school had started a survey to find out what families would need laptops or other devices, and we were starting the switch from optional paper packets to mandatory online learning. Because we only had two laptops to share between the four boys we applied for and were loaned two additional devices so all four boys could be online at the same time.

We also had to make many changes in our daily schedule so that both Donna and I could share the responsibility for overseeing the boys’ education each day. The school set up a schedule for which classes would “meet” each day. Monday was ELA (English Language Arts) and EE (Environment and Ecology); Tuesday was Math and PE/Health; Wednesday was EIC (Science); Thursday was ELA and Music; and Friday was Math and Art. There were also optional morning Google Meet sessions by each of the classroom teachers and a once-a-week OT session for Asher. I took over the Morning meetings, ELA and Math for Ethan and Caleb as well as PE and Music for all four boys and Donna took the rest. For the last 2.5 months, that schedule has dictated how our days have run.

Every morning each of the boys’ teachers would post the assignments for the day in the Google Classroom account as well as send out a synopsis of the assignments via an e-mail. This would be around 8:30. Since the school uses a lot of projects in their subjects, many of the assignments were multiple days in length with certain parts of it due each day for the length of the project.

Since Ethan chose not to participate in his morning meeting, I would work with him from 8:30 to 9:30 on either that days’ academic subject or the special for the day. Then I’d have Caleb starting at 9:30 for his morning meeting followed by other material until 10:30. After that I’d have Ethan again for another hour to finish up the rest of what he was working on for the day. After lunch I’d have Caleb again if needed as well as Isaiah or Asher if it was Music/PE day. By mid-afternoon I’d be done – and totally worn out.

Meanwhile, Donna had the same sort of schedule with the other two boys. In addition, she handled many of the long-term EIC projects which included things like going for a worm/butterfly hunt, drawing pictures of a fly, and other interesting art/environment projects. She’d also be pretty worn out by the end of the day.

Some of the classwork was taught by video – either recorded directly by the teacher (esp. subjects like PE exercises or music exercises), or by the teacher posting YouTube videos for the students to watch. Other parts would be forms or slides to be completed. Most of the work was completed online by filling in or typing into boxes on documents, but some had to be done on paper, pictures taken of them, and then being uploaded to my laptop and attached to the assignment before turning it in.

Unfortunately, while we needed to put many other aspects of our lives on hold, you can’t put “Mother Nature” on hold. The last vestiges of winter were turning into spring and then into summer by the beginning of June. With Donna that meant that her outside plants were starting to grow and needed watering, the weeds were also springing up and needed pulling, grass needed cutting, etc. So, as we moved from March to April to May to June, her days were getting busier and busier as she spent all her time when not overseeing the boys’ schooling outside. My days were getting busier, too, but my various physical ailments limit my ability to help outside.

Finally, yesterday, June 5^th, we reached the last day of school. No longer will I need to sign on to each of the boys’ Google Classroom accounts every day to make sure that all their assignments were getting done on time and turned in. Each of them had a final Google Meet with their entire class for final sharing, mentioning their respective plan for the summer, and getting a final goodbye from their classroom teachers. The latter often had tears as they said their final goodbye – it’s been rough on them too, having to work under such oppressive conditions in ways that they never trained for – and not being able to have the daily contact with their students as one of the perks that teaching has brought in the past.

But as hard as it’s been on the teachers and the students, it’s also been hard on all the families. Usually that’s been the temporarily laid-off mothers and/or fathers, but in our case the grandparents. I’m not sure what Kim would have done without us and I have a lot of sympathy for those families who are not fortunate enough to have situations where they do not have family members available to assist.

We don’t yet know what the future will bring. The preliminary guidelines just released by the PA Department of Education (PDE) are very upsetting and I don’t see how the schools will be able to meet those guidelines. A whole generation of children have been subjected to changing scenarios and we don’t know what the impact on their mental situation is going to be. There is no historic precedence for what we are now going through.

I’m glad that I have learned that God is in control, as I have to rely on him for so many things these days. But at least I don’t have to worry about overseeing the schooling of our grandsons for the next few months, as we instead “just” have the normal activities of summer for a change next week.